Am I the bitch for never wanting to talk to my sister again because of something she said while talking back to me?
07.06.2025 00:21
She said some horrible stuff to me just because I said go fuck yourself.
Hi! I and my sister have always been constantly fighting and getting over it directly. But that changed today. I have decided never to talk to her again, and if I need to, it won't be done nicely. Since because of today, I cried for hours. Let me tell you guys what happend and you guys decide if I am really the bitch or if she is!
Today I told my mother that I didn't want to go with them to Malmö, later my sister came up and said "Are you not coming?" And pulled my Blanket. I slept, but she woke me up. I said "No go away.” She went on and on telling me why and that my grandma always said ‘where was my majoje?’ And that she loves me more than her and my little sister. But I said "No it's my choice." She went on. And I have a big amount of anger issues, so I got angry very quickly. She said I was bad at keeping promises and that i was the only one who broke them, but i said we can, not we are going to. I got angry and yelled, "GO FUCK YOURSELF! IT'S MY CHOICE!" I said before turning over and trying to go back to sleep. She got angry and said, "Say that again. Come on!" Several times until I said it again. She started talking the most cruel, and unexpected words i have ever heard coming out of her mouth rather than ‘whore, idiot, mentally ill, that ive got problems, crybaby, weak, bitch, anger issued, adopted, monkey, cow and pig.’ Because she said ‘I hope you die. You know what? You should kill yourself. No one will love you, you will never have children, never have a man that loves you or get a job, you will be a stripper. When you get older, you won't find a job or anything. You will be so poor that you will find a club and become a stripper. Then you will come to me for help with money and I will not help you because I am PRAYING for all this to happen to you. I will tell everyone that you said go fuck yourself to your own sister. I'll also tell your friend - Name - (Unnamed since it is private information that i am not aloud to say) that you said that to me. Let's see if she or anyone wants to be your friend after this." She said as she walked to the door and left. I started crying directly because i am also very sensitive with my emotions, that's why i get happy, scared, sad and angry very easily. Did I actually deserve to hear her saying that? Should I kill myself? Why did she get so mad over that? It's not like she has never said that to me before. Is everything she said about me in the past and now true? Am I really just a worthless piece of shit that has no bright future and will become a stripper? Does she hate me so much that she has enough of the will to say it? Did I deserve it that much so that she has the right to say it? What if she told everyone in the school? The people I know, my friends, her friends, older people? Was I the bitch?
She said that she will tell everyone I know that I said go fuck yourself to my own sister and see if anyone would want to hang out with me. But isn't what she said worse? I mean I mabye did deserve it or not, but what she said was worse than saying go fuck yourself to your sister, isn't it? If she did tell someone of everyone, I would have a harder time in school. I don't really have a hard time at school other than concentrating and hanging out with people. I have been used many times, where someone even said, “I never liked you anyways, I just used you.” Straight to my face. I also have a hard time identifying my own personality since I have changed it multiple times, thinking that people would like me more if I were what they wanted. First, I tried to be all girly, kind, and use this baby voice when I was in 1th- 2th grade. I was told that nobody likes the baby voice and that I should act and talk normally. I tried to stop since I used it that much and learnt how to stop. Then I tried to be cool towards the boys, but they also just used me. But once that I felt that it was really me and how I acted I got called anoying, I have used alot other personalities but now I have done that so much I don't know who I am. I also have trust issues now because of how many times I have been used, I really can't identify if someone's a real friend or not. I really don't know who my real friend is or not. I also have this friend that I have helped a lot. I always comforted her when she was sad and cried, but she has been really mad at me recently for talking to her too much. Am I really that annoying? I never realised that. My best friend we used to talk and hang out a lot before after our other best friend betrayed us. But after I went back to my original class we hadn't really talked much. When him and our ex bestie were best friends, he never hung out with the boys. But when he and me said we didn't want to be her friend anymore because of everything she had said about him to me behind his back and about me to him behind my back. Also when all three of us were best friends he played football because he had taken a liking to it while I would talk to her. Afterwards we left her, I told him “you don't have to hang out with me 24/7 go play football if ya want.” I don't regret saying that since it was his liking. And if he liked it, I shouldn't stop him. After a few weeks of hanging out he went back to football, we didn't talk for a whole month, but now we talk like once a week or so. I am happy that he is happy. But I am kinda sad, because I have a hard time trying to be with anyone, everyone has their own friends to talk to so whenever I try talking to some of them, I usually get ignored. Last year I got sad and thought about my old best friend. My old best friend before I moved, I wished for her to come back, so we can be besties again. She was the only one that never betrayed me. Last year, she joined my school and class. We are friends but not best friends. She is the person my sister said she would tell. Thank you to whoever fulfilled my wish, I won't say it's God, because what if it wasn't God? But whatever back to if I am the bitch or if she is. I mean if she told anyone, should I tell them about what she said to me? But if she did say anything I will just keep quiet, why should I be like her and say thing to people? She doesn't deserve it. She is already getting bullied by a boy in her class, shouldn't make it worse than it is. She has friends to hang out with, I am proud of what she has achieved. She's strong, not like me, i will never be as strong as her. Mabye she is just trying to make me stronger by hurting me untill words don't hurt. Right now, I have learned a way to stop crying while I am in the middle of crying. I don't know how to explain how I do it. But I have.
Hi! I created this question and I just wanna say what happend so you can actually decide If I am the bitch!
If i stop talking to her, maybe then she will learn a lesson for being 100x meaner than I have been. All my life, she has been more and more meaner. Maybe I did deserve it. Mabye I am the one that has been meaner to her? I don't know. But I don't wanna talk to her.. so am I the bitch? Please tell me, I need to know, so I can change how I act and stuff.